Posted by: comfortjunkie | August 12, 2008

Things to do: buy yoga mat

Today was hot. How hot was it? It was so hot that when I wrapped the towel around me after my shower, the towel that had not, I repeat NOT seen any sunlight, it was like taking it directly from the dryer. It was so hot that I couldn’t do anything but lie on the couch in a puddle of my own sweat in front of the fans all day. Even the cats were little puddles on the floor, like a volcano had spewed cats instead of lava into my living room.

I started my mind control program today. I told myself that I was super excited to go to pilates. I made myself get up and take a cold shower, put on my workout wear and head over to the mall. I did stop and get deworming stuff for the cats on the way. Before class I went into the grocery store and bought a snappy white hand towel and a bottle of water.

I realized as I was doing my warm up stretching that the mat I was on smelled horrible. HORRIBLE. As someone who hates socks and has never worn them with sneakers and the like, I am quite familiar with horrible foot odor. Thankfully these days I’m either barefoot or in flip flops so the point is moot. This mat smelled like the cloven hooves of the price of darkness himself had been utilizing it for an eternity of tae-bo classes. It was the most foul thing I ever smelled and all I could picture during pilates was other people’s foot fungus all over the uncovered parts of my body. Nasty. I am bringing my own mat on Wednesday.

HOWEVER, despite Satan’s foot odor, the class was awesome. For one, I’m not quite as out of shape as I had feared. It could have been worse, much worse. Once upon a time, a million years ago, I worked next door to a pilates studio and I went three times a week. It stopped sucking about a month into it and by month three you could bounce quarters off my ass, I was at least 1/4 of a foot taller, my posture was great, I had no back pain, and I was easily thinner and more fit than I had been in ages, far more fit than I ever was when I was skinny, skinny. Thankfully I know a lot of the pilates and yoga postures because the class would have been a lot harder to follow since it was conducted in Spanish. The teacher is great and she does speak English so when she comes over to correct my posture, she tells me what I’m doing wrong and I can understand her. Bonus.

The girls all seemed really nice and friendly (and not all of them were super skinny). I am very, very glad that I signed up for this studio and you can’t beat the price. I felt great after class too – already thinner (because of the better posture) and more fit. Of course, tomorrow I will probably be sore since there was a lot of that great muscle shaking and tremors as my body inquired as to what in the hell I thought I was doing after a year and a half of inactivity. During the few particularly awful exercises I told myself that I LOVED the feeling of searing pain as I tried to do the Cobra pose without my arms and hands. When I felt like I couldn’t lift my legs one more time for circles, I told myself that this was the best feeling in the world. Mind control, baby.

Afterwards I went grocery shopping at the handily located supermarket in the mall. I bought lots of fruit, non-fat milk, whole wheat light bread…but it doesn’t matter because I’m not hungry. Today I had a bowl of Special K and a PB&J, plus 11,000 glasses of ice water. Not hungry at all. Awesome.

Meridia; for when you don’t have the willpower to be anorexic.

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