Posted by: comfortjunkie | August 15, 2008

The Squeaky Wheel AKA a really boring post about nothing

Yesterday or somewhere thereabouts my car started making a horrible noise. It was an intermittent horrible noise, one that I determined, after hanging my head out of the window and driving very, very slowly for about five miles, was coming from the front wheel well. Since I’m taking a road trip on Saturday and very much would not like to be on the front page of the death paper, I decided to take the car in and have it serviced today.

I went to the bank, got some cash and popped into a brakes/suspension/tire place nearby. I told him that I needed the whole car checked out and that the front wheel on the other side was loud, because I do not know how to say squeaky in Spanish. It would be an hour before they could look at my car but I was prepared. I brought a book. A book that I originally thought was likely the most boring book in the universe unless you are passionate about Japanese men and opera. I took my book and started walking, in the broiling sun, up and down the street looking for a nice cafe to sit in and maybe have a light breakfast/lunch.

I was scheduled for a meeting that afternoon so I was wearing my Sunday best and made-up with face paint (make-up, not like clown face paint, although that would have been cool and made the meeting more entertaining), and so after approximately 1.2 minutes of walking, I was sweating rivers of make-up off of my face. I walked down one side of the street and up the other until I found a place…exactly on the other side of the auto repair joint. Nothing interesting happened there except that I ordered a liter of water and instead was asked something unintelligible which concluded with the words, “no importa?” In case you have absolutely zero deductive reasoning skills, means “you don’t care” or “it’s not important.”

Since nothing is important to me, I smiled and nodded in agreement to whatever it was that said and went back to reading about opera and Japanese businessmen (who were now being held hostage by children with guns, so basically the book got a lot better). I got my fajitas which were amazing and which I did not finish (?!) and a large styrofoam cup which I assumed had my water in it. No, it did not. Instead it had the most awesome agua fresca ever. Some mix of pineapple and orange, it tasted like an orange julius sans the raw egg (gross). It was icy cold and I was grateful.

When I realized that my car was whizzing by me and pulling into the mechanics, I thought I ought to get up and show them where the magic wheel removal key was hidden. Afterwards I retired to the office on a big comfy couch and proceeded with the book and with sweating. The very nice young man came in with a list and accompanying prices and told me in very careful Spanish that these were the things I needed. It could have been a list of random things he needed to pick up the grocery store on the way home and I wouldn’t have known the difference, so I smiled and nodded and told him I need to leave by three for an appointment. They got done at 3:15. I was stuck in that sweltering office for nearly three hours. On the plus side, I have working brakes. On the minus side, I went to my meeting and was the only one there. On the plus side, the store I went to had lots of half and half so I bought three cartons. On the minus, unrelated side, I think maybe I have not only no talent for writing fiction but no desire either. But that is a whole other post and yes, last night I wrote before I went to bed.

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