Posted by: comfortjunkie | October 16, 2008

The Greatest Day in the History of Time

Today will officially be the greatest day in the history of time. Why? Because I am buying a new garbage can for my kitchen. What’s so great about that, you ask? Well, let me tell you.

I bought this piece of shit garbage can almost two years ago and let me tell you, it cost a pretty penny. Stainless steel, tall, with a lid to keep the flying chihuahua out, it has two separate interior pieces. Why? I do not know. Each piece is a black, plastic cylinder with it’s own handle. Is one side for recycling? Maybe. If you only recycle tiny things. The pieces take up the bulk of what would have been a decent sized garbage can but instead make two thin, barely usable tubes. A complete waste. I never could figure out how to use this garbage can effectively.

Because it is small and pointless, the garbage can fills up in oh, about an afternoon. Things get wedged in the tubes and the bags tear when you pull the garbage out. The bags also do not get filled so I’m taking the garbage out more frequently and using 1/4 of the actual bag space, meaning I’m also wasting garbage bags. I hate this garbage can. I loathe it. To look at it fills me with a furious rage. But I could not throw this garbage can away. It cost too much. Things like garbage cans are not cheap here, where the same tub I bought for $6 at Target in the US costs $40 here at WalMart. FINALLY, I feel like I have used it and suffered long enough that I can purchase a new garbage can that doesn’t incite expletives every time I walk into the kitchen. God, I deserve this new garbage can, one in which I can throw away things, any size things I want, without struggling and fighting.

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